let the world spin madly on.

Hello sunshine. its a beautiful day.

 and i am feeling quite lovely. 

As the world spins madly on i find myself realizing that everything changes with time. Sure, the passing of days, weeks, months and eventually years happens gradually. But thats the thing, before you know it everything you know today will be different tomorrow. we loose track of time so easily. it slips through our fingers like fine grain sand. unaware how quickly your pile is diminishing you'll all to soon come to the realization that your hand is almost empty& you no longer have the tiny rocks you once had. instead its an all new ball game and your hand is once again full but with different sand. uneasy and unsure you wonder to yourself. what if i loved the old sand more? what if i wish i could have held on a little longer? why did i let time fall so freely without loving what i had when i had it?

Someday we will all, unfortunately, find ourselves wishing our days away for better ones ahead. Dreaming of a feigned world leaving behind reality. It is when we realize that reality has left us in the dust dreaming of the unimportant that we really appreciate what we took for granted. appreciate the moment in the moment. Don't let time slip away without your consent. it is your life. So cherish it, even when it doesn't turn out how you expected it to turn out. spontaneity can be beautiful.

The passing of days, what does it mean? time is so strange. its almost like a game. depending on how you roll the dice, will determine where you end up on the board. or in our case life. I want enjoy the cards i've been dealt. When i fall into last place instead of feeling hopeless and defeated i want to continue with true grit. ready to conquer my hardships with newfound strength.  And in the moments when the game twists in my favor i want to savor in the light of it all. forget the discard pile. i want these cards. this life. because this is life is mine. and good or bad i choose to live. in this day. for this time.

Back to the world spinning madly on i realized something today that plucked my heart and filled my eyes with a familiar sting. i must accept time and the fact that like it or not she is growing up. too quickly. can't i just save her like this forever? in her quirky little seven year old self? i like her just like this. i love those teeth and that seven year old smile she wears. i love her wide, curious, blue eyes. i love her wild light brown hair. especially when its tangled and blowing in her face. i love her boney little figure and lack of any real shape. except for a sting bean. i love the way she laughs. i love the way she hisses and scratches and acts like a rat. because she is one. i love how sassy she is for a soon to be second grader. and how hard she can make me laugh. she is weird. and i love her for being weird, because there is no one on earth as genuine and real as her. when they ask me what i want to be like when i grow up, the real answer is her. i want to be just like her. because i love her more than life. she is, without a doubt one of the few great things that makes life absolutely without a doubt worth living for.

Time will pass and in a few years she'll be a big kid and i'll just be old. she will be a little different, a little older and a little wiser. but i also know she will still be quincy. its inevitable, she'll always be my ratty no matter the day or month or the year. so for today i'll love her for what she is and tomorrow i'll love her for who she has become. time is a wonderful thing. it gives us the opportunity to learn and grow and become who we need to be to return to our savior. so life, please keep spinning madly on, you are lovely & oh so worth it.

yours truly- nolle.